Because of personal experience I often hear people armed with good intentions saying:
“Suffering will bring you closer to God.”
“Sufferance draws you to your heart and helps you to come out of your ego.”
“Your pain will elevate you as human being.”
All true statements but, no I cannot hear them now, sorry!
The truth of the matter is that we all want to avoid suffering, we want to get rid of this terrible weight leaning, seeming unable to bear for one nano second longer. We are willing to learn any formula, read any book, attend any seminar in order to avoid the pain.
In my opinion though, there is no easy fix, or any methodology we can learn and that can give us the longed guaranteed results.
In few words: There is no way to avoid suffering.
A statement by Plato was: “Only the dead have known the end of war.”
When pain strikes and strikes hard, we could numb ourselves with a wide range of addictions available but regardless, it will get to us soon enough. There is no way but to live and experience pain. Going through it, learning how to transform it to become a stepping stone for our next phase in life, is the only way to heal it.
We therefore need to be soaked in it, go through it, live it and own it.
Being able to do this implies acceptance and stillness, no fit, no rebellion will change our pain but rather worsen it. We need to confront it head on.
It is also said that the cause of suffering resides in the human heart.
In my personal experience, the way to heal the sufferance is to keep that heart open and connected and the only way to do that is meditation. The moment I “take a break” from keeping my heart open I am swept up by the angry river of thoughts, pain, overwhelming emotions that are there, lurking to get me.
Every time that river overwhelms me I know I need to make space, I need to go back to breathing and become aware of those rising emotions as well as aware of those outgoing emotions.
This is the right moment when I realize I let love enter my heart and for a moment suffering is no longer at the first place.
To understand the way, we need to learn how to work with our mind and learn not to let our thoughts unguarded.
Breath and observing rising and outgoing emotions.
Wish you well!
Antonella Lo Re